How to Break Free from the Perfection Deception
December 24, 2007
According to psychologist and Harvard Medical School assistant professor Domar (Self-Nurture
), “everything is never
perfect, and if you expect it to be, true happiness and contentment will always be out of reach.” To teach women to create reasonable expectations for relationships, careers and their bodies, the authors offer quizzes to determine how much perfectionism is influencing readers' lives and interview women struggling with perfectionism. In a three-part process, readers are encouraged to identify, challenge and restructure detrimental thoughts. For example, a woman who decides her neighbor is a more creative parent than she is because the neighbor sews exquisite Halloween costumes should tell herself, “We all have strengths and weaknesses,” and “I do some things better than she does.” The authors also offer step-by-step techniques to tame the perfectionist beast, such as meditation, yoga, mini relaxations and journaling, and advise readers on setting realistic exercise and eating goals. Although much of the advice, written with journalist Kelly, is obvious and easier said than done, it's also sound and detailed and provides a good starting point for perfectionist readers.